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Hi,
I have done two assignemnts and submitted them to teacher but I got teacher’s feedback on both assignemnts and my grade is D on both assignemnts.
Teacher returned both assignemnts with his detailed feedback and want me to redo them by following his feedback and submit them again.
Therefore i want someone who could revise both assignemnts as par feedback given by teacher. The feedback of teacher given on the assignemnt files attached. I already got D on both and this is last chance I got to resubmit them therefore I really want perfect job as par teacher’s instructions and feedback.
i want it done in less than 5-6 hours.
Please let me know if you can help.
Atef AlShehri
Ms. Bainbridge
ENGL 10000-24
October 9, 2013
Rhetorical Analysis
There are various articles that are read on a daily basis. What makes them interesting to the people? When reading on an article about something, the author tries to reach out to a person in certain ways. Portrait beautification technology has important meaning about computer-generated background photography and augments reality said. The work provided has a set of united portrait beautification methods are raised. In order to put together images and backgrounds, a portrait with many layers are is offered and suggested. The effects of the color of the skin and much more has technology that is based on color temperature estimation. Detail experimental results and comparisons are provided to show our approaches are effective. Even with photos looking easy and not so complicated, it has more technology than one can ever think. When doing portraits, there are many things that have to be done in order to make everyone look good. Virtual background photography can be regarded as a kind of concrete application using portrait beautification technologies. Comment by Carol Bainbridge: The first paragraph should identify the article and author you are analyzing as well as the place and date it appeared. Otherwise, it’s impossible to see what this paper is about. Comment by Carol Bainbridge: Dangling modifier – it’s not the author who is doing the reading on something. Comment by Carol Bainbridge: This isn’t clear. Comment by Carol Bainbridge: Sentence structure
Not everyone can write an article on portraits and make them visual for the people. Each article has a certain way to be able to express itself for certain purposes. For this article about portraits, the author wants people to be able to look and see how much there is to work on something as this. Not every photo can be done in a matter of seconds with very little done. The author here makes a person visualize and see how things are done. The picture images of these can help grab the reader’s attention and make a person be more interested in what he/she is reading about. Visual images are the most important when reading about something. Not every person knows how to draw the attention when writing. Mostly it is easier if things are explained in a manner where most everyone can understand it. Comment by Carol Bainbridge: Which article? You have not identified it. Comment by Carol Bainbridge: They are? Aren’t the words more important?
The writer in the “Portrait Beautification” seems to express as an individual who like photography. Each portrait that is created has to go through certain creations to make one perfect of close to it. With the color of skin tones and much more, a portrait is not as easy as people may think. It is stated in the article, in this block, we describe the process of segmenting portrait from the blue background in detail. Firstly, to remove noise, the original image should be processed by direction filtering and Gauss smoothing. Then blue tone value is utilized to converge portrait and background, respectively (Portrait Beautification). This describes part of the process for one to understand more about what it going on when coming up with these sorts of projects. The person wants the audience to see and visualize step by step.
For most articles, people do not see what is going on and creates a less attractive paper. The audience for this person is one who may be interested in this type of work of just photography in general. Each person that may come across something as this and may be interested could be various types of people. The topic has a lot to do with how it is written and how people view it. If the paper does not go along with the title and how they thought it would be, the reader might not be as interested as they thought. The relation with the audience can be easily seemed as a great connection. With the descriptions of everything and how everything is done makes a person more interested even if it is not a daily topic for most. The writer also says in details about something that is very eye catching. Portrait segmentation can be regarded as a process that dividing portrait and background into their respective coherent regions. In our works, portrait pictures are acquired by taking photos under blue background. According to the coherence of the pixels color, portrait, and background should belong to the respective color clustering theoretically (Portrait Beautification). This has a lot of descriptions and makes people want to read more about. In opinion, there could be more than one audience. This description, as stated, helps people that are not even interested in the topic to have a sense of interest.
In order to identify the tone, the reader should try to identify the emotional meaning of the essay. Tone is the writer or the speaker’s implied attitude toward his or her subject and/or the reader or audience. Writers convey their attitudes in the words they choose and in the style in which they write, in turn creating the atmosphere or mood of the essay. The choice of a single word can change the tone of a paragraph, even an entire essay. The tone of the article helps people tell how the author feels about the subject mostly by adjectives, other word choices, comparisons, etc. For this article, the author seems to be interested and excited about a topic such as this. From the descriptions of how everything is worded makes a person seem to think how the writer feels about the topic and work that comes along with it. Not many articles of this sort have an author who is interested as the people are in this one. The details that are given shows the interest taken in this and the interest that they hope to bring from the people reading it.
In this article, there are various images that help explain what it being talked about. Each set of the photos helps with demonstration as they are explained underneath. It can heighten and refine emotion as well as meaning. Visual images can help people understand the true meaning of a novel/book or other ideas, since they can picture them in their minds. Pictures in the books are used to capture the imagination of people and teach him/her morals and more. By seeing the pictures in the books the text gives the child the imagination and the illustration gives the person the setting. Without illustrations an article, book, and more that explains something can be hard to visualize and understand for most people. If a person, as me, needs illustration for something to be more understood and it’s not there, it makes it more difficult.
There are various types of articles. Some have a certain tone, how it is written and just could be interesting in many ways. If an article is explanatory many things need to come along with it. Photos with subtitles should be included for a better understanding. Visual images are the most important when reading about something. Not every person knows how to draw the attention when writing. Mostly it is easier if things are explained in a manner where most everyone can understand it. Portrait beautification technology has important meaning about computer-generated background photography and augments reality said. The work provided has a set of united portrait beautification methods are raised. Each person that may come across something as this and may be interested could be various types of people. The topic has a lot to do with how it is written and how people view it. In opinion, there could be more than one audience. This description, as stated, helps people that are not even interested in the topic to have a sense of interest.
Works cited
Liu, Heng, Jinqi Yan, Zushu Li, and Hua Zhang. “Portrait Beautification: A fast and robust approach.” Science Direct. Image and Vision Computing, 11 Dec 2006. Web. 30 Sep 2013.
Atef,
I know that reading and writing in a second language can be difficult. However, reading the prompt and the sample rhetorical essay is very important if you want to do a good job writing a paper. I read your whole paper, but I stopped commenting and marking on the second page because I had no idea what you were writing about.
The first paragraph, as I noted, has to tell the reader what the article is that you are analyzing, who the author is, where it was published, and when it was published. It then has to provide a thesis with an assessment of the effectiveness of the rhetorical strategies in the article. From there the paper needed to provide the credentials of the author and a brief summary of the article as well as the audience and purpose of the article. After that, the paper needs to provide an analysis of the rhetorical strategies of the article: tone, ethos, logos, pathos… There is almost none of that in this essay.
See the rubric below. (It continues on the next page.)
English 100 Rhetorical Analysis Evaluation
Name: Atef AlShehri Score: 36 / 60 ( D- )
Use this rubric to understand what you did right and where you went wrong in your assignment.
Good
Adequate
Needs Work
Format and Mechanics:
Paper is 4 typed pages, double spaced.
X
Sentences are clear and well constructed.
X
Transitions and topic sentences are used appropriately to move the discussion.
X
Paper is free of spelling, punctuation, grammar, and other mechanical errors.
X
The paper includes a Works Cited page.
X
Very Good
Good
Adequate
Needs Work
Content and Organization:
Introduction identifies the author, text, and original source.
X
The introduction includes a thesis that makes a claim about the effectiveness of the text.
X
The paper provides a very brief summary of the original text, identifying the author’s thesis and purpose.
X
The paper provides the writer’s credentials, so we know why he or she has the authority to comment on the issue.
X
The paper identifies the audience(s) for the article, noting where the text was originally published. The relationship of the writer to the audience is also described.
X
The paper describes the tone (attitude of the writer toward the audience) and voice in the paper. Voice considers diction, sentence and paragraph development, and the kinds of details or support provided.
X
The paper discusses ethos, logos, and pathos in the original text.
X
The paper explains how form and genre influence the effectiveness of the text. This includes illustrations, graphics or structural elements such as headings.
X
The conclusion provides an evaluation of the rhetorical effectiveness of the text.
X
Surname 1
AlShehri | 6
Atef AlShehri
Ms. Bainbridge
ENGL 10000-24
11/20/13
Technology Addiction
The wide use of technology, particularly computers and the Internet, appear to be the most effortlessly abused and addictive ______. This is attributed to the fact that this collaboration is easily available, cheap and affordable. In addition, the Internet presents exciting content, accessibility, visual stimulation, anonymity and autonomy that all adds up to a greatly psychoactive encounter. Psychoactivity refers to effects on a person’s behavior and mood changing activities. Additionally, these technologies affect the way people live, and associate with one another. It is true to assert that some of the implications are in actual sense less than constructive, and may lead to numerous negative psychological impacts (Kraut 1018). Comment by Author: A bit wordy and unclear
The latest improvements in the digital technologies including the Internet are some of the technological advancements in our time that have unpremeditated negative implications. However, the encounter of challenges with fresh and unidentified technologies is not new. There have been numerous examples of improved and newer things that have led to unanticipated harmful effects. Examples include atomic power, thalidomide, the television, fossil fuels, and other inoffensive expediencies, which may be useful, but on certain occasions have been rather deleterious. Some of these harmful implications are disastrous and quite apparent, whilst others are more delicate and stealthy.
Even outwardly inoffensive improvements such as credit card gas pumps, drive through services, remote controls, dishwashers, and elevators have all contributed towards unintentional and undesirable implications. Although they help in saving time and energy, they discourage people from physical exercise and unfortunately propagate the inactive lifestyle they bring.
Technology has become rather unprincipled; this is because it is neither evil nor inherently good, but it influences the ways people live their lives from day to day. Americans are considered the biggest technology lovers globally due to the faith and trust they have embedded in it. In addition, most people around the world love technology due to the great optimism for the future it holds. It is considered a possibility of an improved today and an extended tomorrow, which enthralls people to take part in activities that lead to an improved way of life. We are living in an age where digital technology and computers are continuously on the nib of countless possibilities with fresh and improved ways of doing things. This is attributed to the fact that the old is swiftly becoming archaic within a very short period, usually a few months to a year. People have developed the notion that newer is always superior, and although the Internet and computer gadgets are believed to make lives simpler and much easier, to some extent it may not be that fulfilling. Comment by Author: Not the right word here.
It is true to reckon that people have ended up becoming more psychologically and physically dependent on numerous substances and behaviors for many years (Shotton 222). This uncontrollable configuration does not imitate an unpremeditated awareness, but rather encompasses an obsessed configuration of utilization that can regularly intensify to harmful implications in people’s lives. The main life capacities that appear to be negatively affected include financial and legal status, relationships and marriages, health and employment. Comment by Author: Not clear
The fact that drug substances such as alcohol and additional mood changing associated drugs can develop psychological and physical addiction is widely recognized and acknowledged. Furthermore, addictions such as shopping, sex, work, eating and gambling have gained much more recognition in regards to their behavioral possibility. Nevertheless, in recent times there has been recognition that the uncontrollable and the obsessive potential of these addictions may impersonate the obsessive behavior found with drugs and alcohol. The same obsessive behaviors are also linked to various aspects of technological addictions. Technology, through the Internet and computer devices can generate vibrant mood alterations and close to 30% of Internet users acknowledge to utilizing the Internet in altering their moods to dismiss a negative state of mind. It can be suggested that for users developing such addictions, the Internet is utilized as a drug. (Greenfield 405). Comment by Author: Wrong word Comment by Author: admit Comment by Author: Period goes only after the parentheses.
Effectiveness of content is referred to as the motivating prospective of the material observed online. Sexual content appears to be the most motivating content that stimulates the greatest levels of online use. It is possible to deal with a number of subcategories of Internet addicts and abusers. In addition, there exists the possibility of some level of collective alterations between sexual addictions, obsessive shopping and obsessive gambling. Interestingly, sexual addiction is considered the highest amongst Internet addictive users (Cooper 156).
Stock trading, auctioning and shopping behavior are greatly affected through utilizing of the Internet. The stimulation possibility of the services and products appears to be closely associated with the absence of real time public cues that are apparent in old-style moneymaking exchanges. It appears that the lack of any social context to procuring eliminates any final evidence of ruling or limitation. The pick and click elements of the Internet are very alluring to many and the instant element of customer-founded e-commerce appears to amplify the possibility of making acquisitions. Regrettably, users are seen returning their previous purchases, succeeding a digital form of buyer’s penitence, whereby the inimitable element of the Internet generates an inclination towards impulse buying, followed by repentance and guilt. Another element that makes the Internet shopping so attractive in the fact that one uses virtual money, with no human interaction, in order for monetary transactions to take place.
An additional form of Internet abusers includes the technological vagrants. Vagrants refer to individuals who surf the Internet for long periods of hours without any particular objective or aim. The experience of appearing online is in itself self-appealing, as they love learning new information as it becomes available in the Internet, visiting new sites, and appreciating the multimedia recreation. These technological vagrants find the entire Internet encounter incredible and mind-altering, and feel that it is their duty to enjoy and master it. No individual can encounter online closure that makes the Internet so enchanting. People tend to go back to parts of their lives that are incomplete and it is this helplessness to complete anything on the Internet without closure that keeps people online, and keep going back for more, even lacking a coherent prerequisite to do so.
The third form of Internet addiction is one where a person becomes addicted with personals, e-mail and chat rooms. These people spend a lot of time deriving a substantial amount of social interactive fulfillment from the social associations they create. The Internet socialites often go to great lengths to maintain an attractive or interesting online presence. Virtual experiences often substitute real encounters with people, and individuals earn greater levels of virtual social ranking from the amount of time spent online.
The last form of Internet abusers is related to people who find addiction accessing online activities, which are greatly motivating. This can be gambling, shopping, pornography, stock trading, and auctioning. Numerous people have conveyed some challenges with these areas before going online, but for them, the Internet supplemented salt to an injury, by compounding the problem. Others appear to have little or no challenges until they engaged in these behaviors online. It appears that the Internet can ultimately break the final remnant of confrontation, and for some, acquaint them with these behaviors for the very first time.
Technology and particularly the Internet and computer devices appear to be the most straightforwardly abused or overused, and can therefore be attributed to be addictive. It appears that the Internet has generated a congregation of Internet-associated challenges. The collaboration of ease of access, low cost, available content, visual simulation, anonymity, visual simulation, and autonomy all lead to a life-changing encounter that affects a person’s way of life. It is true to assert that most technologies implicate the way in which people live and associate with others. It should be considered that unless technology advances people’s quality of life, it is of no value. This is because generating and availing new innovative technologies does not necessarily mean they are benevolent. In addition, there is need for future research on Internet addictions to look into the probable behaviors that exist among Internet abusers. Furthermore, the psychological contrivances of addiction and the specific elements that are most apparent among these uses must be explored. Moreover, there is need to analyze the unique association that exists between the Internet and sex as most challenges that are attributed to Internet addiction revolve around sex.
Works Cited Comment by Author: Check again how to do dates and volume/issue numbers in MLA.
Cooper, Alvin, Scherer, Coralie, Boies, Sylvain, Gordon, Barry. Sexuality on the Internet: From Sexual Exploration to Pathological Expression. Professional Psychology: Research and Practice . 1999. Vol 30(2): 154-164. Print.
Greenfield .Psychological characteristics of compulsive Internet use: a preliminary analysis. Journal of Cyber Psychology and Behavior. 1999. Vol 2(5): 403-412. Print.
Kraut, R., Patterson, M., Lundmark, V., Kiesler, S., Mukopadhyay, T., & Scherlis, W. Internet paradox: a social technology that reduces social involvement and psychological wellbeing. Journal of American Psychologist. 199 Vol53(9): 1017-1031. Print.
Shotton, M. The costs and benefits of “computer addiction.” Journal of Behaviour and Information Technology. 1991. Vol 10(3), 219 – 230. Print.
I see by your title that your topic is technology addiction, but most of what you write about is internet addiction. That is fine, because that’s what the paper should be about, not technology in general. Another problem is that the paper should be about a debate – whether the internet is addictive. Instead, what the paper is about is the different types of internet addiction. Is there some other debate I’m missing here?
This is why I was concerned about your missing so many classes. We went over this quite a bit during the classes that you missed. In any case, hopefully you can revise this paper to make it more of a debate. That should help. Also, try to write more simply. A lot of what is here is hard to follow.
Score: 52 / 75 ( D+ )
I’m sure you can do a lot better on the revision. Be sure to ask me for help during lab if you need it.
