Asking for revising and editing my essay.

MLA format

No copying (No plaigirism)

Double spaced

Need to stick to the prompt.

– I need help revising and editing my essay.

– I also need help to write few more paragraphs because I anwered half of the prompt question.


the prompt is “After reading Gladwell’s Outliers and other research about success, decide what success means to you. Write an essay in which you explore success past, present, and future using examples from Outliers and   your outside research.”

I answered half of the question in my paper, I just need help to write about how did i achieve success in the past, and how I will use the old success to achieve success in the present, and how i will use the success in the present to achieve sucess in the future.


So, I study eletrical engineering. when you write a paragaraph about success “past, present, and future” need you to mention that i am eletrical engineering…you know your job 😛


Important note: when you are going to write success in the past, present, future…you must write each one of them in a seperate paragraph

Note: I can negotiate the price as long as I find a good offer.




Ali Esmaeel

April 22, 2013

Amanda Harrison

English 113B

Effort is the Key to a Successful Life

Have you ever asked your self, what did you achieve for your self for the past year? Was that achievement considering a success to you? Many people believe that happiness exist when they achieve one of their goals because the results of achieving the goal will satisfy them. What is success? Success is something that you earn after you accomplish a goal. Furthermore, success is not winning or losing, but it is all about how courage you can be in order to succeed your goals. Everyone loves to be a successful in everything that they do. Each of us has dreams that want to come realistic. However, not everyone put big effort in their work to achieve their dreams because self-disciplined and setting goals are missing in them. It believed that people become successful from the efforts that they made because everyone have some kind of abilities, but not everyone make the efforts to use their abilities to succeed. Success will only result after hard work. Without hard work, success might not be the wanted results. For instances, a student who works hard day and night will result to be successful in their classes. On the other hand, student who is lazy and careless will most likely fail or do badly in school. “No pain, no gain.” –Jane Fonda. This demonstrates if we do not put big amount of effort in the work, we should expect to not receive great results. In another words, we would not become succeed.

The concept of successful from one person to another is slightly different, however, all these concepts converge in the desire of self-satisfaction. Regardless of what this ambition, it requires self-disciplined and setting goals to complete it. Talal Bin Waleed is a prince of the Saudi loyal family. In addition, he is a businessman. Despite the financial successful that waleed Bin Talal earned in the past decades, his successful was not made by his own effort because he relied on his family reputation to achieve his fake successful. Although some people use their families’ reputation in their respective society to succeed, success to me is to graduate from college and serve the community; by being self-disciplined and setting goals a healthier and happier life will be achieved.

Self-discipline is a key to success and graduate from college. Self-discipline could be defined as an “Ability that make yourself do what you should do, when you should do it, whether you feel like it or not” says Elbert Hubbard, American Philosopher and Writer (Tracy). It distinguishes the failure from success. For example, I hit the gym five times in the week, whether I feel it or not, liked or not in order to achieve my goal and success. Self-discipline is a mandatory and it needs to be acquired to achieve goals in order to become more successful in life. It considers a type of effort because self-discipline requires strong will to continue achieving the plan of goals. In addition, it is the key for a happier and healthier life because it helps to increase the determination of the person and self-discipline will become stronger. A survey “New Years Resolution Statistics” made by University of Scranton, indicates that 8% of the people who never succeed and fail on their resolution each year. This demonstrates that these people did not use self-discipline to achieve their goals in order to be successful. However, the same survey clarifies that 8% of the people who have infrequent success. This illustrates that these people did not only relied on the luck, they also did not use a crucial ability that if they used it to achieve their goals they would accomplish everything they dream of, which is self-disciplined.

Additionally, some people believe that graduate from college then serve the community can be a great success because they can change the community to a different shape and secure their lives. There are some people used the self-disciplined to graduate from college and serve the community resulted in a great and happy life such as: Michael Jordan, Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, and Brian Tracy. Despite that Steve Jobs did not complete his college education, he used the material that he learned from the classes he took before he drop out from college to build the first Macintosh. Steve started his life in a very hard way. For example, he left his biological mother to live with new parents. Many years later, after he became a grown young man he did not have a house to sleep in, so he had to sleep on floor in friend’s room. Also he was hungry most of time because he did not have any money. Later, he became more matured and ordered himself to acquire self-discipline and he used it to become the CEO of Apple Company and t successful person (Jobs). Another example of self-discipline, In the Outliers, Bill Gates was suffering in his educational period because he wanted to be an expert in programming computers. Therefore, he had to work extremely hard day and night to be successful. He created his own self-discipline and it resulted to invent Microsoft system, which led him to a successful and secure life that serves the community. (49-52). Both examples demonstrate that if we used self-discipline to graduate from college then serve the community, we will receive magnificent results like secure and happier life.

I admit that using family’s reputation may lead to a luxurious, secured, and happier life. However, an online articles “Board of Directors” indicates that Waleed Bin Talal believe that he used his family reputation to become very successful in his life. I disagree because that is a fake success because he did not use the magnificent ability, which is self-discipline to achieve a goal; instead he relied on other sources to become a successful businessman like his respective royal family reputation to earn fame and wealth. I argue that success will only exist if self-discipline used in our characters because it will help me to graduate from college, and then serve the community. Graduate from college and serve the communities will my life happier, secured, and successful.

Words Count: 1035

Works Cited

“Board of Directors.” Kingdom Holdings Company. Web. 16 Apr. 2013.

Gladwell, Malcolm. Outliers: The Story of Success. New York: Little, Brown and, 2008. Print.

Kinkade, Shawn. “The Bridge between Goals and Accomplishments? | Aspire.” Aspire The

Bridge between Goals and Accomplishments Comments. Web. 17 Apr. 2013.

“New Years Resolution Statistics.” Statistic Brain RSS., 13 Dec. 2012. Web.

23 Apr. 2013.

Steve Jobs’ 2005 Stanford Commencement Address. Perf. Steve Jobs. YouTube. YouTube, 7 Mar.

2008. Web. 16 Apr. 2013.

Why Are Some More People More Successful? Perf. Brian Tracy. YouTube. Youtube, 19 Jan.

2011. Web. 17 Apr. 2013.

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