how white lies can be good for your marriage

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With deception being a form of non-truth, Smith argues that no relationship is without a type of show. While these degrees of fraud can vary between hurtful things such as faithfulness or money issues, they can also include the small, mundane aspects of white lies. As Smith argues, if deception is a given aspect to any relationship, it is more important to focus on adapting to the idea of fantasy versus the show itself. With this article establishing that deception is a factor in any relationship, it makes the idea of telling white lies to protect another more viable.

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In furthering Smith’s notions on deception, Judee Burgoon and Kory Floyd’s article on the motivational drive to tell the truth versus fraud discusses how people try to lie to one another. In the year 2000, this article argues that the harder a person tries to lie to another, the more difficult it is for them to tell those lies successfully. In translating this notion to the context of this literary analysis of white lies in relationships, it is evident that attempting to maintain massive, damaging lies such as an extramarital affair causes great strain within a relationship. On the opposite side, small, simple, and mundane white lies, such as saying you like a new dinner or a new set of bathroom towels, are accessible forms of deception to maintain. When weighing the gravity of these issues against the severe and painful problems that can come into play in a marriage, it is evident that a white lie does not hold much ground in the context of all scenarios.

In forwarding the idea of the strain that deceivers feel with their partners, Seiter, Bruschke, and Bai’s 2002 article on the social acceptability of deception discusses what society thinks is alright regarding truth in relationships. According to the report, the company finds that it is acceptable for strangers to be deceptive with one another to protect their privacy. Still, that same behavior is not permitted in marriages. Understanding that American society expects marriage to consist of open relationships, it is clear where there can be a negative stigma associated with telling white lies.

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